Size Friendly Fertility Support
If you are struggling to get pregnant, it can feel like a very lonely place. It’s even lonelier when you’re in a fat body. You don’t want to talk about it with anyone, for fear of them judging you based on your size and telling you to “just lose weight”, as if you hadn’t heard that a million times before.
Being able to access size friendly fertility support is a game changer. It allows you to access healthcare without being judged or shamed. Even the fear of that judgement can raise our stress levels and impact our health.
Being able to talk about your concerns with people who get it can help you get back to a place of trusting that your body is capable of getting pregnant without weight loss.
You can talk about the risks of getting pregnant in a bigger body and come away from the conversation feeling fully informed and hopeful instead of petrified.
You can work out which health promoting behaviours will support your fertility and your health without having to follow a set of rules that takes you further away from trusting your body.
You can unlearn the hundreds of ways that we have been taught to hate on our bodies so that when your future babies are here, they will grow up knowing that their bodies are there to take them on incredible journeys rather than to look a certain way.
Finding size friendly fertility support isn’t always easy. We have to fight that inner monologue that tells us that we aren’t worthy of that kind of support, that we don’t deserve it. We have to do our research and find the people who will be able to give us support that doesn’t automatically involve shrinking our bodies.
But when you find that person or that network, who accept you right now and know that you are capable of becoming an incredible parent in your current body, it’s worth its weight in gold!
So where can you find size friendly fertility support for yourself?
Social media: No matter which social media flavour you enjoy, you’ll be able to find others going through the same experiences as you.
Join a fat positive Facebook group like Fat and Pregnant Community or Fat and Fertile
Follow affirming hashtags on Instagram like #plussizepregnancy #fatpregnancy #fatpositivefertility and #fatandfertile
Find 1-1 support: Create a support team that is size-friendly. This can include a therapist, an intuitive eating nutrition counsellor, an acupuncturist, a coach like me, anyone who will be able to listen and support you without judgement. Try the Health At Every Size directory for fat-friendly providers.
Find a fat-friendly fertility clinic: When you need medical assistance getting pregnant, finding a doctor that will support you can take a lot of energy. Here are three things you can try to make your life easier in finding a supportive clinics
If you have any local fat friends or are part of local fat groups, ask them if they have any recommendations.
You can send initial inquiry emails to local clinics asking about their BMI cutoffs, their patient of size policies and their experience treating people with higher BMIs.
Search my Fat Positive Fertility Clinics blog post to see if there are any near you.
No matter what, you are worthy of care and support right now!
Nicola is a fat-positive fertility coach, feminist and author of “Fat and Fertile”. She advocates for change in how fat people are treated whilst accessing help with their fertility. Nicola supports fat people who want to get pregnant using her unique FAT+ve fertility framework to find their own version of health without diets, advocate for their bodies, relearn how to trust their body and believe in their ability to get pregnant in their current body.
